I pruned the dickens out of the two peach trees a few months ago. Ever an optimist, I stuck the branches in buckets and vases throughout the house and breezeway hoping to hurry Spring. It didn’t really work. Out of the many dozens of sticks, one bloomed. While my experiment ended up making my house look more like Miss Havisham’s than Martha Stewart’s, this one elegant spray was enough to make it worth it. See?
It’s a little convoluted but somehow, these pink beauties encouraged me to pay attention to my neglected blog. I’ve started many actual posts that remain sitting in my cyber home as drafts. I’ve ‘written’ even more – mentally. During the last few weeks there have been a few nights when I woke up with what seemed like almost formed essays and thought – grab your computer – do it! More devoted to sleep than words, instead I rolled over. I’ve been inspired on many meanders with our little mutt Rufus. Captivated by something on a sparkling morning or moonlit night I thought – today I will blog – and didn’t.
I’d like to say I’ve been writing other things – but I’d be lying. For me, writing is like exercising or yoga or meditating. If I don’t carve out a time to do it everyday – it falls by the wayside. My discipline in all things has lagged. The hours are eaten up by mundane routine of life – work and socializing or on the couch reading and watching what always feels like too much television even if I insist to myself that it’s mostly good stuff – English mysteries and reputable news. Ha! And let me confess too, my shame about lost hours staring at social media sites like some bored teenager. Ugh. So that’s what happened.
My lone blooming peach branch out of all those branches in 4 different buckets and 2 vases, made me thing that as well as being lazy, maybe I’m being too precious lately about about what I post here. There’s certainly a bit of existential angst – why am I doing this for all these bloody years? But I’m pushing back against this paralysis! Inspired by the damn twigs so hopefully sitting in water for months, I’m going to write and trust that out of it all, sometimes there will be a beautiful bloom.
Creativity is a lot about showing up and doing it. I need to get back into working the muscle. Like moving my body or eating right, getting enough sleep – all things I feel better doing so why not do these things? Yes – it’s been winter, hibernation and all that. But enough. The blossoms are blooming and today, without rereading this a million times, doubting, tweaking, fussing — I’m going to press publish.
How was your winter?
Oh, how I love this Tricia!!! A wonderful reflection – wise and honest…and well-written! The photo is lovely and the inspiration it sparked was a joy to read. XXOO
I’m glad you did push “publish.”
I’ve begun writing again. I recently took a writing workshop and dutifully wrote each week for 7 weeks, just sitting in a room w other writers, and then, once the workshop ended. I stopped my routine. So now I’ve found a poets group that meets weekly. I’ve written a new poem. I think it’s proably awful, but it’s on paper, and something else will develop, maybe slowly, since this new poem is now formed.
You have addressed this process so beautifully here, I love your blog post.
Perfectly imperfect you seem to say, but alive on the page and sure to grow other texts. It’s the nature of things.
More, please.
I’m fairly mesmerized by social media these days too. I especially enjoy following the kids from Parkland—they make me optimistic about our future.
So good, Tricia. The world is better when you “ press publish”.
Getting past a block is tough. I sure miss your writing. Hopefully these blossoms will reawaken your creativity, though I’d say this post is a delightful start.